The End Is In Sight

     I have less than 3 months left until my service as an Urban Agriculture Extension Agent for Peace Corps Senegal is over. That is exciting and terrifying at the same time. At the end of this month I will have been living in Senegal for 2 years. In real time that seems like quite awhile, where careers are started, families created, and technology advances at a mind-spinning pace. I suppose in some way, I too have experienced all of those things in my little town in West Africa. Peace Corps will be a experience that I will continue to draw on as I search out where my career may lead, with increased knowledge, patience, and flexibility, along with an entire network of Returned Peace Corps Volunteers (RPCV's) that I can tap into for assistance. I certainly have made a family here, not only by being adopted into the Sylla household in Kaffrine, but also my Peace Corps family, full of fellow volunteers who have shared my highs and lows of service (only a fellow PCV can understand why we would call pooping one's pants a gold star). My exit from this country will be full of emotion. I have had to start some of my goodbyes already, and they haven't exactly been dry-eyed. It will probably only get worse the closer I am to leaving. As for technological advances, I have seen children learn to use electronics that I don't even know yet, and then watch them teach those around them. Villages are beginning to use solar energy to power well pumps, boutiques, and much more. People here have created ingenious ways to recycle everything. I wish more people in the western world were willing to do that. So yes, I guess 2 years really have gone by, and all around the world people are living it as fully as possible. It seems to have gone by far too quickly though.

     I find myself feeling that the Becca of America, pre-Peace Corps, no longer exists, and that the Becca of Senegal won't fit in very well when she tries to fit into her old roles. How do you explain that you are still yourself, but very different at the same time? Perhaps saying my former self no longer exists is not quite true, but I do feel like my experiences the past 2 years have shaped me into a stronger, more resilient individual. It may have been the most difficult 2 years of my life for many varied reasons, and I think that if I were the same person I was before I came, I wouldn't still be here. But I am, and now the next step is to go on and find a new place for myself, full of more experiences that will mold me into a better person. I haven't quite figured out in all of the ways I have changed yet, and I don't think I will until I am confronted with moments that question that. Our minds and wills are malleable, our souls are eager for inspiration. I decided that the only way I could shape my life into what I want it to be is by pursuing those experiences that will force me into a disequilibrium, the optimal place for learning.

     So the next step is to wrap up my service here, slowly make my way back home, and then when I'm in a calm, quiet place, I can begin to digest my experiences and use what I learn to choose my next direction. I know it will take awhile after returning to find that lull, I have many people and places I want to visit upon my return, but it will come, and it will be good. Everyone needs some time to just sit and ponder life. It is one of the things I love about life here: people are willing to just sit with nowhere to go, and nothing to do for that brief bit of time beyond loving that moment of tranquility. I find it best when I sit in my garden, balancing on the edge of the cement water basin, feet splashing in the cool water as I enjoy the light breeze that rustles the leaves of the neem tree above my head. A blissful moment.

     The blessing and curse of my service is that now I am in the height of my abilities, my language is decent, people have come to accept and trust my knowledge, the rains are active and helping everything to grow and flourish, my projects are going well, and inchallah, the harvest will be good. And so I will leave on a high note, but at the same time, two years just isn't enough time to be really effective. If I were here longer, there is so much more I could do, more people I could work with, more communities I could serve. But two years is all I can offer right now. My family back home needs me and I need them. So two years will have to be enough. Perhaps later I can do more.

     With all of that in mind, I intend to make these last few months as memorable as possible. This month I was able to spend a fair amount of time visiting some of my favorite places, including going to Kedougou and cycling out about 50 km each way to reach the breathtakingly beautiful Ingeley waterfall for my birthday. I also went to an Training to teach English and have been holding informal lessons at my house with the children in the neighborhood. Ramadan, the month of fasting is almost over and we will celebrate by killing and eating a goat. This weekend we will begin transplanting the 2000 trees we seeded and cared for the last couple of months. We are preparing for our annual girls camp, which starts August 18^th. I just met with the families of all of the girls I chose from Kaffrine to make sure they will be ready, and I'm working on lessons I will be teaching. And in a month I will join volunteers from around the country for the Mangrove Reforestation project. In the midst of all of those things, I am finishing the paperwork to complete grants, working in my garden, advising my master farmer, and managing the affairs at our regional office. Soon I will will be phasing out of my roles and working to install others to fill the positions, or find a way for projects to sustain themselves through the work of community members.

     A lot to do and to think about over the next couple of months. As of October 31, 2013, I will get my “R” and join the ranks of RPCVs around the world. Then, we'll see what life has in store next.